by Becca Cox, LMFT, LPCC
Spring is often a time of focusing on organizing and cleaning out the things that no longer serve us. There is emphasis on tidying up all the messy bits around the house and bringing fresh order to daily life. Engaging with a physical mess often brings with it a myriad of emotions ranging from relief and energizing success to overwhelm and guilt - not unlike when we mentally clean house.
Habits can lead to disengagement. When routines are created it’s often with consideration for meeting the current needs - either consciously or unconsciously. However, routines can become comfortable and continue unquestioned even if they no longer adequately support our needs. Messiness is often an indicator that a habit is no longer serving us well.
Mess can be an agent of change. When mess becomes uncomfortable it creates a need to pause and reflect, to ask questions of current routines and allow for important adjustments. Mess creates urgency to engage, to adapt, to consider change. Attention is redirected toward the status quo as current systems are examined to determine if they may no longer be enough to support us like they have in the past.
When our mental house begins to feel messy it can be the catalyst needed to begin an examination of our mental habits and routines. Feelings can often feel messy, especially if experiencing more than one emotion at once or an uncomfortable emotion for an extended period of time. Sometimes an emotional mess can feel so convoluted it can be overwhelming to know where to begin.
One place to start is by focusing on one specific area of your life - one relationship, one experience - and identifying what feelings are present as you reflect on that topic. Notice if you are comfortable or uncomfortable with those feelings. How is your body responding as you consider this subject? Would it be beneficial to you to engage more with these emotions to untangle and better understand them?
Perhaps all that is needed is a quick evaluation and reorganization of a specific experience. Maybe time spent journaling out your thoughts to help you make sense of the mental mess or a revision to a personal boundary or self-care routine. Other times it may require something more drastic like a metaphorical renovation of your mental house to start fresh from the foundation up with a new organizational system. For a more intense organization of feelings it may be appropriate to seek out professional support for guidance.
However you choose to begin to tidy up this season, know that you do not have to continue to live in the discomfort of mess.
Spring is often a time of focusing on organizing and cleaning out the things that no longer serve us. There is emphasis on tidying up all the messy bits around the house and bringing fresh order to daily life. Engaging with a physical mess often brings with it a myriad of emotions ranging from relief and energizing success to overwhelm and guilt - not unlike when we mentally clean house.
Habits can lead to disengagement. When routines are created it’s often with consideration for meeting the current needs - either consciously or unconsciously. However, routines can become comfortable and continue unquestioned even if they no longer adequately support our needs. Messiness is often an indicator that a habit is no longer serving us well.
Mess can be an agent of change. When mess becomes uncomfortable it creates a need to pause and reflect, to ask questions of current routines and allow for important adjustments. Mess creates urgency to engage, to adapt, to consider change. Attention is redirected toward the status quo as current systems are examined to determine if they may no longer be enough to support us like they have in the past.
When our mental house begins to feel messy it can be the catalyst needed to begin an examination of our mental habits and routines. Feelings can often feel messy, especially if experiencing more than one emotion at once or an uncomfortable emotion for an extended period of time. Sometimes an emotional mess can feel so convoluted it can be overwhelming to know where to begin.
One place to start is by focusing on one specific area of your life - one relationship, one experience - and identifying what feelings are present as you reflect on that topic. Notice if you are comfortable or uncomfortable with those feelings. How is your body responding as you consider this subject? Would it be beneficial to you to engage more with these emotions to untangle and better understand them?
Perhaps all that is needed is a quick evaluation and reorganization of a specific experience. Maybe time spent journaling out your thoughts to help you make sense of the mental mess or a revision to a personal boundary or self-care routine. Other times it may require something more drastic like a metaphorical renovation of your mental house to start fresh from the foundation up with a new organizational system. For a more intense organization of feelings it may be appropriate to seek out professional support for guidance.
However you choose to begin to tidy up this season, know that you do not have to continue to live in the discomfort of mess.